One hard truth I’ve come to know about myself is that I love being unemployed. Don’t get me wrong, I’m ready to be done with this particular season of unemployment for financial reasons, but my God I was not born to work.
Today, in typical “your unemployed friend on a Thursday afternoon” fashion, I was spending some quality time with my cats by partaking in their favorite hobby, Looking Out The Window.
My window looks out at the apartment building across from me, nothing particularly exciting to see there. Unless, of course, you’re a cat. What is it that you’re seeing? I ask myself. Is it the way the trees are moving in the wind? Is it the little bugs that are dancing in midair, bouncing sunlight off their wings? Oh, there! Is it the squirrel that’s resting on that balcony railing, tucked away in the shade? I’ve heard that cats see movement most clearly, are you tracking those shadowy figures moving around in the apartment on the left? Can you see them with more clarity than I can?
Can cats see color? I’m inclined to say they don’t see it the way we do, and I wish I could explain what green looks like to me. Do the trees stand out against the sky for you? What about the roses, do you see them in all their peachy pink glory? I can’t smell them from here, but I’m sure you can. I can hear the birds, but can you understand them? Oh, there he goes, those little songbirds fly so fast, don’t they? Oh look, a butterfly, and there, that leaf just detached, it sure is taking a long time to reach the ground. The wind just picked up, look how all the trees sway differently.
The world is full of wonders, if you’re a cat.
I’ve been thinking a lot this week, as I’m sure many of us have, about humanity, and the ties that bind, and what it means to be a person in this world who is inherently connected with all the other people in this world, and what do you do when you have to reckon with the horrors… you know?
I have no answer for the horrors.
What I do have is this picture of an extremely well-maintained hedge.
Sometime last year, my friend Daniel came to visit me. He was staying a few blocks away and walking back and forth between the place he was staying and my house. On one of those walks, he got to talking with the woman who was working in the garden with the hedge. During this conversation she gave him a piece of gardening advice:
When you have a tightly trimmed hedge like the one pictured, you always want to trim it so that it is slightly wider at the base than the top. That allows the full expanse of the hedge to get sunlight, and avoids the undercut-die-out that you sometimes see on those box hedges.
Daniel explained this conversation to me the next day, partially as a fun anecdote about chatting with a stranger, and partially to pass along the advice. I have never met the hedge-lady, but I walk by her house all the time. Every single time, I remember her advice. In fact, it is now so ingrained that should I ever have box hedges, they will 100% be trimmed at an angle, and should anyone ever compliment me on said hedges, I will pass along that advice.
It’s a trivial example, I know. But I can’t see that hedge without thinking about quickly the stories we tell and the knowledge we share is spread. You never know who you’re helping by sharing something. You never know who looks at a tire and thinks about advice that you gave someone 10 years ago, or whose life has been touched by a story you shared that has been retold and retold. We are so much more connected than we think. The energy we put out into the world radiates so much further than we realize.
I know it feels like a drop in the bucket. We are all connected after all, and the horrors persist. But you don’t know how far your small act of kindness, or on-the-sidewalk teaching moment will travel, and so you must also persist.
I don’t know where this art came from, but it’s fun and I appreciate a dose of whimsy perhaps more than the average person, so I always stop to admire it as I go by. Today, in the context of the aforementioned feelings, I appreciated it more than usual. The words, which are hard to see I know, say “only love can do that”.
Bits & Bobs:
I have perfected the art of boxed macaroni and cheese and no one can tell me differently. These are the key add-ins: dash of milk, heavy spoonful of either plain greek yogurt or sour cream, black pepper. Bonus points if you boil the pasta with some chicken bouillon or bone broth. That’s right, I’m a grown up.
A few weeks ago I was in the car with Lauren and, in frustration at another driver, I accidentally emitted the most perfect duck quack. Like, I cannot even tell you, it was so good that she looked around to see where the duck was. Unfortunately, I have been chasing the high ever since. Even more unfortunately, I live alone which means I’ve just been randomly quacking occasionally to see if I can do it again. So far no success, but I really fear this is going to become a embarrassing-for-future-me-habit.
I’m competing in my first big girl amateur competition not this weekend but next weekend and I finally retired by biohazard-level-stinky old shoes just in time to break in some new ones. To be loved is to be changed, and all that.
Luckily for my new shoes I now own practice shoes, so they won’t have to put in quite as many miles.
The next serial installment is under way, things are happening, the responsible adults are being sent far away where they can’t interfere with young people going on adventures, the stakes are being raised, barefoot dinners are being eaten, I’m having fun. As always, if you’re interested in being a first round reader please upgrade your subscription and/or let me know if $5/month won’t work for you… trust me, I get it.
Relatedly, I’ve had 2 people ask me how they can support my work if they are not interested in reading fiction (fair enough). Substack doesn’t have a one-time tip option, but if you really feel strongly about helping me out you can venmo me via the button below. My sincerest thank yous to those of you who asked, I appreciate your support in all of its forms so much.
And with that, happy Friday! This weekend I will be cat-sitting, dancing, helping Lauren move, doing dishes, writing, comp prepping, and hopefully napping. It’s going to be full and fun, and probably not that restful but that’s ok. I hope your weekend is everything you need it to be, and I will catch up with you next week.
As always, thank you so much for being here.
xoxo,
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Love, love, love you❤️❤️❤️